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Pastor Ben Bigots

Brief Bio of
Pastor Ben Bigots

 

Ben Bigots was born Nov. 12th, 1929, in Eastern Meridian, Mississippi. He and Fred Phelps of the Westboro Baptist Church were both members of the local Boy Scout troop. There they were raped repeatedly by several other scouts and the scout master throughout their ten years of membership. This laid the foundation for what would later become their rampant homophobia.

Ben attended Meridian High with Fred Phelps and graduated at age 16 with much higher academic honors than him, including: American Legion Citizenship Award, track letter, Bausch-Lomb Science Award, Eagle Scout, and Principal Appointment to East Point Military Academy. The summer following graduation, he had a profound religious experience, in which he and Fred Phelps were both urinated on by a gay lion at the Meridian Zoo. (This served as the origin of both Phelps and Bigots' on going obsession with scatology.) Due to this incredible experience, Ben gave up East Point, and enrolled instead for Bible/ministerial training at Bob Jones College, Cleveland, Tennessee (later moving with them as they transitioned to Bob Jones University, Greenville, South Carolina).

Ben was ordained by the Southern Baptists Sept. 7th, 1947 and met his wife, Marcie M. Bigots, in 1951 while preaching at the Arizona Mental Health Institute in Phoenix, Arizona. Marcie suffers from several intense psychological and cognitive disorders that render her incapable of rational thought and coherent speech. For her safety, Ben keeps her tied to a chair in the basement of the Eastboro Church. Their marriage- May 14th, 1952 has been blessed of God with 14 children, 55 grandchildren (to date), 6 great-grandchildren (to date) and 8 miscarriages (though God killed them because they would have become fags).

Ben Bigots is a strong proponent of inbreeding. The Bigots family breeds strictly amongst themselves in order to protect themselves from “fag genes”. Thus, once God returns in the Rapture to damn the sinners’ wicked souls to Hell, the Bigots family and the Eastboro Church congregation will be the only ones spared. Ben is also a strong advocate of child abuse. Every Sunday, the entire Eastboro congregation gathers together to beat the living sin out of their children in what is appropriately called “Love Beatings”.

Ben has served as Pastor of the Eastboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansa, since Oct. 1955. EBC has conducted more than *44,000 picketing demonstrations across America and some foreign countries during the past 12 years -- aimed at showing Americans their transgression (Isa. 58:1) and causing Americans to take us absolutely seriously.

Ben has won "best picketer" over runner-up Fred Phelps at the annual Fag Hater Awards for the past 10 years.

*It is worth noting that this is twice as many demonstrations as the WBC. In your face WBC.

It is also important to note that, although Ben Bigots does have some striking similarities to Fred Phelps, it is nothing more than coincidence, and they were never anything more than acquaintances. (although some sinners at Meridian High have spread some nasty rumors saying other wise, they have no basis aside from something they thought they saw behind the school that was actually a big misunderstanding and wasn’t at all what it looked like)

 

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